Monthly Archives: February 2014

Homework stress

Yes, sometimes it's easier if I just did it all myself!

Certainly would be much easier for both of us if I did!

There was a cranky man who swallowed his kid’s homework.

I don’t know why the jerk swallowed his kid’s homework.

Perhaps he’s going berserk.

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There was a cranky man who swallowed some wine.

That tickled and tinkled his entire spine.

He swallowed the wine to drown his kid’s homework.

I don’t know why the jerk swallowed his kid’s homework.

Perhaps he’s going berserk. Continue reading

Quick Fic’s: The woman

I have decided to introduce fictional short stories to my regular roster of posts (see Origin of Quick Fic’s as to why I cooked up this crazy idea). What follows is my maiden effort.

I fell in love with her the very first time I saw her.

The attraction was immediate and had a sense of destiny to it all. Even though I have never met her before, there was a connection between us that was clear for all to see.

She wasn’t in the best of conditions that memorable night. There was no make-up, the hair was matted to her sweaty forehead at the front and terribly dishevelled at the back. She looked like she had just run a marathon but was definitely carrying some extra pounds all around. Continue reading

Reader’s Indigest

What's the relevance of the apple ... or the girl?

If you buy this magazine, you’ll get a girl like this with the apple thrown in for free

I sometimes splash out and buy one of those fitness magazines.

These usually stand out on a cluttered newsstand because their covers always feature an incredibly muscular man, with an incredibly beautiful babe hanging off his arm. I take it the subliminal message is: “Buddy, if you want a chick like her, you better buy this magazine and get buffed like him“.

And these magazines are not cheap. The particular title that I occasionally buy costs $8.95 a copy.

For that amount, I can get 2.5 regular-size cups of soy flat white from my favourite barista. This is a type of hot beverage that we in Australia call coffee – much better than anything from Starbucks. Then again, I don’t think the stuff Starbucks sells is coffee, so it’s hardly a fair comparison.

Continue reading

The Talented Mr Hoffman

The way I choose to remember him.

The way I choose to remember him.

More than 20 years ago, I saw a film called Scent of a Woman. Even though I was very young at the time, the affection I had even then for all things Al Pacino was legendary among everyone who knew me – something that has continued to this day.

However, there was a funny-looking minor character in that film who fascinated me. He played the role of a preppy spoilt brat so convincingly that I had trouble distinguishing between him and all the preppy spoilt brats I knew at the time. Continue reading