Monthly Archives: February 2014

Homework stress

Yes, sometimes it's easier if I just did it all myself!

Certainly would be much easier for both of us if I did!

There was a cranky man who swallowed his kid’s homework.

I don’t know why the jerk swallowed his kid’s homework.

Perhaps he’s going berserk.

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There was a cranky man who swallowed some wine.

That tickled and tinkled his entire spine.

He swallowed the wine to drown his kid’s homework.

I don’t know why the jerk swallowed his kid’s homework.

Perhaps he’s going berserk. Continue reading →

Quick Fic’s: The woman

I have decided to introduce fictional short stories to my regular roster of posts (see Origin of Quick Fic’s as to why I cooked up this crazy idea). What follows is my maiden effort.

I fell in love with her the very first time I saw her.

The attraction was immediate and had a sense of destiny to it all. Even though I have never met her before, there was a connection between us that was clear for all to see.

She wasn’t in the best of conditions that memorable night. There was no make-up, the hair was matted to her sweaty forehead at the front and terribly dishevelled at the back. She looked like she had just run a marathon but was definitely carrying some extra pounds all around. Continue reading →

Reader’s Indigest

What's the relevance of the apple ... or the girl?

If you buy this magazine, you’ll get a girl like this with the apple thrown in for free

I sometimes splash out and buy one of those fitness magazines.

These usually stand out on a cluttered newsstand because their covers always feature an incredibly muscular man, with an incredibly beautiful babe hanging off his arm. I take it the subliminal message is: “Buddy, if you want a chick like her, you better buy this magazine and get buffed like him“.

And these magazines are not cheap. The particular title that I occasionally buy costs $8.95 a copy.

For that amount, I can get 2.5 regular-size cups of soy flat white from my favourite barista. This is a type of hot beverage that we in Australia call coffee – much better than anything from Starbucks. Then again, I don’t think the stuff Starbucks sells is coffee, so it’s hardly a fair comparison.

Continue reading →

The Talented Mr Hoffman

The way I choose to remember him.

The way I choose to remember him.

More than 20 years ago, I saw a film called Scent of a Woman. Even though I was very young at the time, the affection I had even then for all things Al Pacino was legendary among everyone who knew me – something that has continued to this day.

However, there was a funny-looking minor character in that film who fascinated me. He played the role of a preppy spoilt brat so convincingly that I had trouble distinguishing between him and all the preppy spoilt brats I knew at the time. Continue reading →